Big Brother is watching...

Well, El Jeffe has finally managed to demonstrate her superiority by tracking my every move. She asked me to go out to the store to fetch some French bread to go with the spaghetti bolognese we were having.

So I went to the store near our house and found the bread. I waited in the queue to pay (getting angstier as I waited - I hate queueing for anything) and just as I reached the checkout the store's telephone rang. I waited some more, as the checkout person chatted on the phone, writing little things down, smiling and doing the 'wait a moment' thing by raising her index finger at me (and doesn't that just make you want to drown someone). Then she put the phone down, looked me straight in the eye, and said "You need to get some garlic as well."

Here's the thing: how did she know it was me? I mean, she didn't ask who I was, my name, or anything. She just knew. Apparently, my wife had told her what to look for. 'Short, holding some French bread' was the description I got, although it probably included 'bald, talks kinda funny' too. Whatever. The point is, El Jeffe tracked me down to the store herself, then used one of her undead minions to identify me and pass the message on.

Anyway, now we have cellphones. Or rather El Jeffe has a cellphone. I have a homing device that I can also use to make telephone calls with. Maybe she should have just fitted me with OnStar. Or LoJack.

Thought for the day - just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not watching you. Night, all.

All work & no play...

Well, it's been a busy week (hence no post since last Saturday) and I've had enough of X-ray for a bit. Which is unfortunate, because I'm going in from 3 to 11 today. I'm going in from 8.30am to 11pm tomorrow, too. Oh, when will it ever end? Well actually it will end in August, because I'll be done with school and the Registry exam on July 26th (see earlier post regarding Registry) and it'll be time to kick back & relax a little. I'm planning to visit Mum in Britain as she is leaving hospital for the first time in eight long months. I'm planning to go to Nag's Head with my delightful wife too, if we have time. Then it will be back to work. Only this time, I'll have a full-time job which actually involves a REDUCTION in my hours spent at that hospital - no clinical training, you see. No nights, no call, no working for nothing for 7 hours in the day, then going to work in the evening or night-time work. No bowel studies (flouro-filming barium being poured down throats and/or up butts) or voiding cysto studies (flouro-filming people peeing onto my X-ray table) hopefully, either - I'll be doing orthopedics Mon, Wed & Fri, and Emergency/Trauma cover every other weekend. A pay rise. Benefits. Sick pay. Holiday pay. 401K available. Healthcare. Oh, joy. Oh, bliss. Did I mention the pay rise? El Jeffe will be so pleased, what with her birthday coming up and all...

Thought for the day - take time to make time. Night, all

The road to recovery

Well, my mother is finally going to get to go home from hospital. It's been eight months since she went in and we're all glad it's over. What started out as backache turned out to be a meningeal cyst, needing surgery and some top-notch antibiotics to clear. Meanwhile, pneumonia, MRSA and a lingering kidney infection set in. Now Mum is pretty debilitated from lying around for so long and has to build up some strength. But she's a tough old bird and with luck she'll recover to a point where she can do most, if not all, of the things she used to do. I'm just glad that she has recovered this far-when she first became ill there was doubt that she would survive. I'll be going to Britain to visit in August or September.

Thought for the day - tomorrow never comes. Night, all.

Cruising along

Well, my wife & I had a bit of a tiff. We both need a vacation (see profile) and she has been very keen on going on a cruise to Europe, probably down the Rhine or the Danube. I'm not too keen on the idea, and I think we ought to try a cruise somewhere here in the US before we go all the way to Europe. What if I don't like it?

I must admit that I do have a rather jaundiced view of cruise vacations, which is odd, really, seeing as I've never been on one. I just keep getting these images of that Caribbean Cruise advert with the old people watching a stage show, eating in the ship restaurant and shopping for jewellery and aftershave for ten days. But she is adamant that we're going on one, and to be fair, she wants to go on one where you get off the boat and do stuff every day.

So it appears that El Jeffe has won and we're going to book one up for later this year, or possibly next Spring. She wants to go to Europe, although I quite fancy whalewatching and visiting the frozen wastes of Alaska. Or Southern Chile & Antarctica. Or maybe somewhere really remote, like the Galapagos Islands in the footsteps of Darwin, or Easter Island (now there's a thought. I've always wanted to see those giant stone heads.) And you never know, I might just get a taste for it.

Thought for the day - beatings will continue until morale improves. Night, all.

Wrestling with demons

In a move to save some cash, I've decided to do my own car maintenance for a while. I used to think that those greasemonkeys down at Bodgit Exhaust & Tyre Centre or wherever were a rip off. Having had my radiator drained and not refilled by an actual dealer shop, and had my oil drain plug chewed up and thread-stripped once too often by a supermarket lube shop I shall call Tram-Law for legal reasons, I still do think they are a rip-off. But those places that actually do real work on cars, where people with cherished classic cars might take them to be fixed, make no mistake, they are miracle workers.

I just replaced a sway bar link on my Expedition. It's a long bolt, with a nut on one end, in a plastic tube. Cost me $7.00. You unscrew the nut, pull out the bolt, put the new one on, tighten the bolt. That's it. That accursed bolt took me 2 hours to remove. That's $140 plus tax at my local expert's shop and I would have gladly paid, had I known how hard it was to replace. It's 93 degrees here today and it's humid as well. I was sweating like a pedophile at a scout jamboree just getting the thing off. In the end I broke the plastic tube into pieces and used a hub puller (yes, for those in the know, it took a tool built for separating heat-shrunk flywheels from crankshafts to get that bolt out.)

No, I'm not going to pay a grease monkey to change my oil, grease my chassis, pour tap water into my radiator and change my wiper blades for ones that don't fit. But when it comes to real work, I'm taking my car to those in the know. They might say they fix cars, but believe me, those people wrestle with demons.

Thought for the day - the older I get, the better I was. Night, all.

Not now, Kato, I am in search of ze 'Oly Grail

Well, I've just been to see The Da Vinci Code with my wife, and to be honest I'm saddlesore. It's a very long film - 2 & 1/2 hours, so if you haven't seen it and want to, take a cushion. Other than that, it wasn't bad, as such, just a little preposterous. Tom Hanks does the quiet, clever, restrained thing he does so well (see Apollo 13 and The Green Mile). His lovely co-star Audrey Tatou is very French and feminine. Ian McKellern plays Gandalf in a plaid shirt. Paul Bettany has an almost comic turn as a psychotic albino monk, and Jean Reno plays a bitter French cop. The plot is pretty much a chase across Europe in search of clues, followed by an obsessive policeman working for the Pope. Think National Treasure meets The Pink Panther. The thing is, do we care enough to really enjoy the movie ? Well, some Catholics would have Ron Howard and Dan Brown burned at the stake for the postulations of the plot (that Jesus had a wife and that his bloodline ends with Audrey Tatou) but mostly it's a complicated, uneventful but entertaining cryptic chase movie. It's just a pity we didn't get to see Audrey Tatou extending the bloodline - although perhaps not with Tom Hanks.

Thought for the day - do unto others as they would do unto you. Only make sure you do it first. Night, all

Whistlin' Dixie

I see the Dixie Chicks are at it again, making a point of not apologizing for their comments about Bush & the war in Iraq. And why should they? After all, isn't the right to voice an opinion just one of the things that the War is about? Are we not trying to nurture the seed of democracy in the stony ground of a former dictator-state? I say, let 'em rant, let 'em rave, and let 'em refuse to apologize. However, let 'em also remember that we don't HAVE to buy the new Dixie Chicks CD. I, or my wife, probably will anyway, because we like their music. But some people won't, because they don't like the Chicks' politics. Or maybe their music, either.

No, I think democracy means you can express a view, even if you are a musician. But it also means the rest of us can vote with our feet - or our wallets - and choose not to buy the CD. Let's face it, you need to play to your audience, and if the audience is conservative, they may not appreciate a liberal stance. Voice your opinions by all means, but don't be surprized if we don't all agree. If you're a politician we stop voting for you and you lose your job. If you're a musician, we stop buying your music and you lose your sales stats. Or in the inimitable style of Larry The Cable Guy, "Them's pretty girls, and they sing some nice songs, but that little fat one need to learn when to shut up." Although I happen to think she's rather cute.

Thought for the day: When your in deep, stop digging. Night, all.

Bye Bye, Saturn

Well, we sold my wife's car tonight. She has had her Saturn station wagon about 3 years and it was time for a change. Her new Solstice has become the favourite, and the Saturn had to go. She's been on for about 3 months about what a piece of junk the Saturn was, but to be fair to it, gas consumption was pretty frugal (especially compared to my beloved Expedition) and it has been very reliable. I have to admit, though, that it was just about the nastiest, most uncomfortable car I've been in. I tell a lie - we borrowed a tiny old Toyota once, from a cousin, that had a plant growing in one of the cupholders and was so dirty that a trip through the car wash cut white-and green-tiger stripes into the algae and lichen growing all over the car. And I had a car once that had a realtor's sign pop-rivetted into the floorboard, and concrete and chicken wire in the rocker panels to hold them together. So maybe the Saturn wasn't that bad . It's all relative.

So that leaves us with one gas-guzzling behemoth for me, and a totally impractical convertible for my wife. But heck, she can get 30mpg in her car and I can get the dog in mine, so we can live with it. Things will be a little tight at the palace until gas comes down in price, that's all. We might have to fire another servant.

I just got back from walking our dog in the local park, and while I was there I picked up 2 empty drinks cans and put them in the bin. No, not walked over and placed them in the bin - they were so close to it I stood there and THREW them in. What is it with some people, they wouldn't throw empty cans in their own yard, would they ? Well, maybe they would. I don't know.

Thought for the day: Never let common sense stand in the way of a good time. Night, all

The Registry looms

Well here we are, I'm coming to the end of my X-ray Tech training, and it's been, how shall I put it, a choppy ride. I'm booked in to do the American Society of Radiologic Technologists exam on July 31st, and I'm starting to get apprehensive. I mean, I know I can pass the thing, yet the exam nerves are kicking in - and it's only May ! Still, 2 years' training, 300 questions, how hard can it really be ?
On the plus side, I've been offered a good fulltime job with the local hospital, 5 minutes from home, no call, no nights, Tuesday & Thursday off, with every other weekend - and I'm not even graduating until the end of July !! Things could be worse.
On the subject of the Hospital, someone drove up to the ambulance bay doors last week, produced a pistol, and shot herself in the head. Don't let anyone say that small provincial towns are quiet.

Thought for the day - how come you can buy a shotgun in Walmart, but you can't buy a bottle of sherry ? Probably for the same reason that you can get into a nightclub with a bag of cocaine between your butt-cheeks but you can't get in wearing a shirt with no collar. Night, all.

Phew !

Well that was a trip ! It's taken me a struggle to get this blog up to this point - computer savvy is one thing I'm not. I'll post something tomorrow, when I've recovered. Night, all.